篇一：校园趣事(搞笑、英语口语、五人、中英文剧本)
此剧本讲述了三个学渣讨债不成、学霸搞基的搞笑故事，结局出人意料却在情理之中。
适合五人表演
校园趣事
场景一
小华家
小华 小雨 小飞上
小雨——大哥 咱们都饿了好几天了 这种悲惨的生活我们要过到什么时候啊 哎
小华——雨 这 大哥我怎么可能不难受嘛 可是常言道 人在屋檐下 怎能不低头 现在我们正在******大学学习 这年头能有这大学读就很不错了 哪还有什么奢求呀
小飞 ——大哥 对了 上个月小罡来问我们借走了500块钱给他朋友交托福学费 都好久了还没还 我们是不是应该去要回来
小雨——是啊大哥 不然的话这样下去我们就得吃翔了
小华——哎 就是 我怎么这岔给忘了 走 走 走 赶紧跟我去隔壁寝室
旁白——兄弟三人就此去了隔壁寝室找小罡
小雨：（敲门）小罡，开门，开门
（小罡对小明做出嘘的姿势）
小雨：好像出去了，我们先回去吧
（走回去）
场景二
小明——大家早上好 我就是天才小明 可我最近却很是郁闷 我那个基友非要拉我去参加什么托福 还要我看这么厚的书 做这么多的题（双手指一指PPT上的金瓶梅给大家看看） 真是太可笑了 我以后可是要当科学家的！！ 干嘛还要我看这种书
小罡—小明（远处喊）
小明——基友来了 他太啰嗦了 我可受不了
小罡——亲爱的 你的书背的怎么样了
小明——这些书看得我头昏眼花 光想打瞌睡
小罡——哎 你看 现在竞争这么激烈 我已经在这待小半辈子了 你要是不好好考托福，我们还怎么去外国留学？
旁白：过了10分钟，三人又来了
（走回来）
小飞：（敲门）开门，开门
（小罡对小明做出嘘的姿势）
小雨：好像还没有回寝室
（过了会儿，又回去）
小明—— 这些书太简单了 统统不用看 （扔书）
小罡——哼 ！！你说简单 那我考考你
小明——小小考试焉能难道我（对观众说）
小罡——首先考你听写（小明郁闷状） 听着 大妈 怎么写 土豪 怎么写
小明——。。。。。。
小罡——土豪 怎么写
小明——（不会 抓耳挠腮）
小罡——你连这都不会。
小明——崩溃了 （捂耳朵 忙劝）
小明（做找单词状）（删除一句）
小罡（怒）——你近日温习功课 一律不准见外人 来人我就说你回家去了我先去洗澡 你给我继续学习
旁白——由于去了两次都没开门，小飞怒了
小飞——大哥 下次要见小罡 你先给我说一声 我把他绑来见你 如此劳烦大哥 甚是无礼
小华——现在欠钱的都是大爷 我们还是再去一回吧
小飞——（等不及了）小罡 快出来 兄弟们 帮我照顾好我七舅老爷和他三外甥女。。。。你要是不出来 我就一把火把你这寝室烧了！！
小雨——葵花点穴手（小飞定住 眼睛睁得大大的）哎 飞 我们是来要债的 又不是来要命的 你把人家砍死了 谁来给我们还债呀 明白了 你就眨眨眼睛
（小飞眨眼）
小雨——葵花解穴手
旁白——过了一会 小华、小雨、小飞三人已经到了门口
场景三
（小华 咚咚咚敲门）
三人：小罡
（小明准备开门）
旁白——小明正在兴奋的时候 小罡马上从浴室出来
小罡——不能让他进来
小明——亲爱的 请放心 我定能让小华空手而归
（小明开门）
三人——还钱！（此时三人用枪指着小明头）
小明——给我一个机会 我想做个好人
小华——怎么给你机会 说出来看看
小明——请看(扇子指向幻灯片 幻灯片放***、****等大全)
小华——（若有所思）看不出你如此有见地
小明——如果我把这文件送给你们 不知可否抵债
小华——这??（瞬间惊喜）不知以后可否抱你的大腿
小明 （眼珠子转转）看来不能帮你。。。
小华——（急）请先生莫要推辞（手里拿着钱，晃一晃）
小明——这。。。。只是小弟近日正在为托福烦恼，如果你能将此事帮在下了结，这也不是不行。
小华——（面有难色）这。。。。
小飞 ——（拉小华到身边耳语到）大哥，这年代，我们可以找枪手，买答案啊。（幻灯片放淘宝上的答案）
小华——好
场景四
旁白——三个月后，托福成绩出来了。
小明——好消息好消息 我托福考了114分
小罡——什么！！114分！！这下我们终于可以去芬兰了（ppt上放“芬兰允许同性恋”图片）
旁白——故事就此完结。
（PPT上放“结束 谢谢观赏”）
SCENE 1:
Actors: XiaoHua XiaoYu XiaoFei
XiaoYu: Brother! We three have been hungry for days and when will this tragic life end? It's so terrible!
XiaoHua: Yu, it's impossible that I don’t feel painful, isn’t it? But as the proverb says it is hard to sit in Rome and strive against the Pope. Now we are studying in ****** , It's very hard to get
篇二：大学英语短剧之甄嬛传 中英翻译 剧本
演员：甄嬛、浣碧、安陵容、华妃、宫女、太监、皇上
The biography of Zhenhuan
ZhenHuan: You see, Huan Bi, what do you think of this handkerchief? 甄嬛：浣碧，你看看我这帕子绣的如何？ 第一幕
HuanBi: Answer to my young master, your workmanship is excellent! I think the emperor would be fond of it.
浣碧：回小主的话，小主的手艺是极好的，想必皇上看了也会爱不释手的。
ZhenHuan: Ah, Your mouth is really sweet. It remains to be seen whether you are still so articulate when you get married.
甄嬛：你呀，小嘴又甜了，看你以后结了婚还能不能这么会说。
HuanBi: No ，no，no ,I am too young to get married.
浣碧：小主说什么呢，人家还小呢，我才不嫁人呢！
ZhenHuan: Oh, come on! You are not little except your eyes. Get married as quickly as you can. Once entering the palace, it is hard to get out…too hard to get out… too hard to get out…get out…（回头拍浣碧）
甄嬛：你让大家看一看，你除了眼睛小还哪儿小呀？要嫁赶紧嫁，可别像我一样，一入宫门深似海，深似海呀深似海（回头拍浣碧）。
HuanBi: To inform my young master, Master An wants to see you.
浣碧：启禀小主，安小主想要见您。
ZhenHuan: Yes, ask her to come in, please..
甄嬛：请进来吧。
Anling: Your Majesty .
1
安陵容：陵容参见姐姐。（拜）
ZhenHuan: Please be up. (扶).
甄嬛：妹妹快请起。（扶）
(The Two bow to each other)
两个人拜两拜。
ZhenHuan: Please have a seat. Just a day without seeing you, why are your voice become so harsh?
甄嬛：坐。一日不见妹妹，这嗓子怎么变了这个声音呀。
Anling: You don’t know, recently I suffer from throat illness again, and the emperor also has not come to see me for a long time
安陵容：姐姐有所不知，近日妹妹的喉疾又犯了，就连皇上也几日没有来看过我了。
ZhenHuan: Throat illness? Didn’t you just have a piles operation last month? How quickly the disease recurred. HuanBi, go to the royal hospital and take some Madingrong for her soon.
甄嬛：喉疾？你不是上个月才做的痔疮手术吗？怎么这么快又复发了？浣碧，一会儿到太医院找温大人开点马丁荣来，送与小主。
HuanBi: My young master, we have it at hand.(拿灭火器)
浣碧：小主，咱们这儿就有。（拿灭火器）
Anling: You are so lucky that you can get everything you want. While I am so humble and always looked down upon. And…keep this Madingrong for yourself. You see, I have been much better, now I can even sing ! 安陵容：姐姐真是好福气，宫里要什么有什么，不似陵容，身份低微的，人也总被人瞧不起。不过这马丁荣软膏就留给姐姐自己用吧，你看，妹妹的嗓子已经好了，还能唱歌呢。
ZhenHuan: Oh? Would you sing for me?
2
甄嬛：那你唱与本宫听听。
江南可采莲…
江南可采莲。
ZhenHuan: The song is too vulgar, but your voice as mildly crisp as oriole, and you are the super dancing queen in the entire palace! Come on, have some tea for your throat. 甄嬛：太俗了，不过妹妹的嗓子却如黄鹂般婉转清脆，连论舞技都是后宫里的super dancing queen呢！快，来喝口茶润润嗓子吧。
Anling: Hey, what is it? It is not your Snow top with Tracy.
陵容：咦，这是什么茶，不似姐姐平日里喝的雪顶含翠。
ZhenHuan: Try it first and see whether you like it or not.
.甄嬛：你先尝尝再说，看喜欢不喜欢。
Anling:（喝一口，吐）The tea is good, but it smells like the bird droppings. 安陵容：（喝一口，吐）茶是不错，不过陵容喝着总是有一股鸟屎味。
ZhenHuan: I know you are good at making spices. It seems that you always eat the bird roppings. You a fool. This is western tribute tea, called snow cap of coffee, and I’m the only person to have the tea beside the emperor.
甄嬛：本宫平日知道妹妹善于制香，今日妹妹这么一说，看来妹妹平时没少吃过鸟屎。这是今年西洋进贡的茶，叫雪顶咖啡，皇上独独御赐给了我呢。
Anling: How dare I compare with you ? Keep this snow cap of coffee for yourself. You see, Huafei is coming, and I don't want to have anything to do with her. So, allow me to leave now..
安陵容：陵容哪敢跟姐姐相提并论，这雪顶咖啡还是留给姐姐一人享用吧，姐姐你看，华妃娘娘来了，我平日素不愿与她来往，陵容先行告退。
3
第二幕
Eunuch: HuaFei is coming!
太监：华妃娘娘驾到。
ZhenHuan: Your Majesty! Long live the empress!
甄嬛：给华妃娘娘请安，娘娘万福金安。
HuaFei: Don’t stand up until someone applaud for you..(after 20 seconds) OK, you can be up now!
华妃：没有人给你鼓掌，你就不能起来。起来吧。
ZhenHuan: Thank you.
甄嬛：谢娘娘。
（华妃放杯子）
放杯子。
HuaFei: It seems that your handicraft is better than before. Is this for the emperor?
华妃“几日不见妹妹，妹妹的手艺又好了。这是绣给皇上的？
ZhenHuan: You always miss nothing! I will give the emperor this handkerchief to express my love for him.
甄嬛：什么都瞒不住姐姐，这个帕子正是送与皇上的来表达我对他的爱。
HuaFei: Love? The emperor love you? Oh , come on! I’m the only woman the emperor loves ! I’d like to tell you what is the emperor’s love.
华妃：爱？皇上爱你吗？皇上爱的是本宫，本宫倒想让你看看什么叫皇上的爱。
ZhenHuan: Ah, your headwear is really beautiful!
甄嬛：呀，姐姐的头饰可真漂亮呀。
HuaFei: If you like it and I will take it off and give it to you. Oh, but you are still only a concubine of the emperor, so you can’t wear this Mickey new style.
4
华妃：喜欢我的头饰那我摘下来给你，哎呦我忘了，妹妹还是嫔位，不能带我们妃位的米奇新款。
ZhenHuan: You are kidding!（？？不太确定妹妹哪敢跟姐姐相提并论呀）How dare I compare with you? Because of your good figure and beauty, so the emperor dressed you with the lamp. 甄嬛：姐姐说笑了，妹妹哪敢跟姐姐相提并论呀？凭姐姐这身材，这相貌，皇上才给姐姐装灯的。
HuaFei: No matter how I dressed , it is not for myself. I am the woman who manage the six palace, so I can’t dress shabby like someone.
华妃：装不装灯的我也不是为了自己，咱毕竟要协理六宫，不能像某些人穿得那么寒酸。
（甄嬛暗中换杯子）
换杯子。
HuaFei: But then again, I also dress it for myself. Look, there are so many beautiful girls who are the emperor’s new beloveds sitting under the stage. 华妃：可这话说回来，我又何尝不是为了自己。你看台下坐着的，。
ZhenHuan: So many new beloveds. The emperor is really great.
甄嬛：今年这么多新宠，皇上可真厉害。
HuaFei: Yep, we both know how the emperor is. Write down the names of the beautiful girls who are under the stage , and I will train them .Now have my HuanYixiang .on. 华妃：是呀，皇上身体怎么样，咱俩都知道。去，把台下漂亮女生的名字都记下来，本宫要好好调教一下，顺便把本宫的欢宜香点上。
Maidservant: Yes ,sir.
宫女：是。
5
篇三：英语搞笑话剧剧本
二人用版本
Scene1（At Salesman’s home）
N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman. He always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students. He has a lot of money now. But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu …… He is coming! S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you .I’m the famous candy salesman at the school gate. My candies are very popular,(展示)，I don’t know why. The foolish students always come here. I’ll be a boss soon! Candy, money, candy, money……
Oops! It’s time to make candies now.(看表)
First, put the flour on the table.
Then, water, sugar, flour.(边说边做)
Now press, press……
Oh, my dirty hands! Never mind! Just do it!(满不在意的神情)
Press, press……
Oh, my god!Never mind! Just do it!
Press, press, the children will not know it , it’s OK,hehehe…… Now let me cut it into pieces
加旁白1人属于4人用）
白雪公主与七个小矮人 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs 英文短剧本
旁白：Once upon a time, there was a queen. She had a pretty daughter named Snow White. Soon after the child was born, the queen died. The queen married another queen. The stepmother was very jealous. She dressed Snow White in rags and forced her to do the housework all day and all night, such as sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on. 白雪：( Sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.) 皇后：I’m the new queen. I’m very beautiful. you see. If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her. I have a magic mirror. If I want to know something, It will tell me surely.Now, mirror, mirror, come here! 魔镜：Yes, I’m coming. Your Majesty! What do you want to know? 皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the wall.Who is the fairest of the all?
魔镜：Yes. Your Majesty! You are the fairest of all, I think.But there is a young lady. She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.She is much more beautiful than you.
皇后：She is much more beautiful than me?Who is she? Tell me quickly.
四人用版本
Global warming
A． Class begins, good afternoon everyone.
B． C. D ：Good afternoon, teacher.
A. First, I will ask you a question: What is the serious problem nowadays ?
B. I think it’s the problem of environment pollution.
A. It’s related to our correct answer. But it isn’t correct one.
B. Is it the problem of population increasing?
A. No.
C. Oh. I got it. It’s global warming.
A. Right! Global warming is one of the serious problems nowadays. Because……
B. Teacher. I have a question. It was very cold indeed this winter. I think it’s global cooling!
A. You got the wrong concept. Global warming doesn’t only mean that the weather is getting hot, but also mean that the weather is out of control. So it will be sometimes very cold.
B. Teacher. What causes “ global warming”?
C. I know. Now people drive too many cars and the exhaust gases discharged by the cars and lorries pollute the air and also destroy the nature. It causes global warming.
A. You are right. Do you know what will happen with the global warming?
B. Yes. The ices in South Pole are going to be melted and at the time, many islands will be gradually flooded with water. Human will have no places to live.
C. Surely, we don’t want that will happen.
A. What sould we do to stop “Global warming”?
B. I think we can protect the environment from ourselves. We can plant trees
C. When we are protecting the environment, we are saving ourselves.
A. Ok. Students, we can’t only speak but not do later . Let us go planting trees.
D. Oh, teacher! Tomorrow is March the twelfth, it’s tree-planting day!
A. Yes! Now all of you know the importance of protecting the environment.
B．C．D．Let us do our best to stop “Global warming” and make our earth a lovely homeland!
A. That is good . I hope you all will be succeeded in protecting the environment. Now the class is over bye-bye students!
B.C.D. good bye. Teacher.
（4人版本）
Narration: Carrie, Cici and Wing are co-worker of a company. This day they are talking in the office.
Ca: Bingo! I finally finish this case. It is really tough! I have not slept well for almost a week.
Wing: Me too .I always get so busy in this season. I have drunk three cups of coffee in order to keep awake.
Ci: Our boss must be enjoying his holiday in Fiji very much. What do you think he will feel when he comes back to see our case?
Ca:Of course he will feel surprised and give each of us a promotion. Wing: Come on, he is a devil, how could he do this to us? Anyway, we should award ourselves for these days hard work!
Ca: You are right. Let’s pig out on junk food!
Wing: I have stayed in China for a whole year and I miss my hometown. I miss German food!
Ca: so do I .how much I love French food!
Ci: I have not eaten German or French food before. Do you have any recommendation?
Ca: If you visit France or go to a French restaurant, snails, cheese, and goose liver and red wine are the best choices.
Wing: You also can’t miss the famous German sausage, ham and blue checse Ci: They all sound yummy. But do you know what Chinese eat when they miss their families?
Wing&Ca: No
Ci: The answer is dumplings!
Ca:Well ,I heard that before though I haven’t tasted .
Wing: Can you make dumplings, CiCi? Would you make some for us? I have been longing for dumplings for a long time.
Ci: Aha, it is as easy as a pie for me .what about coming to my house tonight? We can make dumplings together. I will teach you how to cook it.
Ca: Great! That is fantastic. Then it will be the first time to make and eat dumplings
Wing: Very good idea! We could busy some basic ingredient at the supper
market after work.
Ci: Sure.We need flour, yeast, pork, cabbages, vinegar, sauce and ginger. (The three colleagues had their shopping and now they are in CiCi’s house) CiCiours some pour on the table and said:”Carrie, can you fetch some water here?”
Ca: sure, here you are .what s next?
Ci:Ci:we have to mix the flour yeast and water together .be careful ,don’t add too much water.
Ca: Okay, I’m kneeing the dough repentedly.it is becoming and softer Wing: Yeah, I am cutting the pork into many small pieces, and then I will add several spoons of oil in it .shall I blend them?
CiCi: Yes, make sure they blend well. A bit salt and a spoon of vinegar are needed, too.
(an hour later)
Ca: Yes, the dumplings are prepared .lets start!
CiCi: Wait! I remember well that you all miss the food from your hometown.Look, what are these?
Ca: Wow! Cheese! Where did you get it? And my favorite red wine. Wing: God. Those are sausage and ham, I can’t believe it!
CiCi: Haha, it is a big surprise, isn’t it? Now ,we are got all three countries’ food ready.
Ca: So it is a complete big meal.
Wing: An unforgettable banquet in my life. Let’s cheers!
Ca, Ci, Wing: Cheers!
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